What About the Seahorses?

Andrew Valdez
5 min readAug 7, 2023

Be what is true. That’s what every comic strives for. To find that one thing everyone else is overlooking or too uncomfortable to talk about, wrap in up in some funny paper (think genital wrapping paper), and a deliver it to a curious yet unsuspecting audience. But what even is the truth anymore? Nowadays it seems like truth is no longer as foundational as it once was. Instead there’s all these pieces of truth, all equally valid and worthy of respect. But is that really the case? Can multiple truths exist simultaneously? And who decides if they’re all relevant or which reigns supreme?

A lot of people will claim our society is too touchy to accept life’s real truths. That somehow wokeness, cancel culture, and inflammatory media have all ruined any chance of unearthing the real truth. I call bullshit. Truth does not crumble to any worldly fad. Otherwise it’s not really the truth.

Take sex and gender as an example. “Oh great. Hear comes another dipshit comedian trying to cement his opinion on people for the purpose of clout.” Hey, shut up! And by the way, you spelled “here” wrong, idiot. “Well technically I’m a made up character your using to fluff the audience before you say some controversial shit. Idiot!”

You’re*. As in you’re a bitch.

Sorry about him/her/them, now what was I saying? Oh right, sex and gender. Here’s my opinion on it; who cares? Seriously, what does it actually matter? Historically the truth around gender and sex was that you take one male, one female, they fuck and make more males and females. While that’s mostly true, let me ask you this; what about the seahorses?

Yeah that’s right, seahorses. Radical right wing Americans greatest nightmare. The horse of the sea. A species where the males give birth and also have sex with other sea steads on the side. Shhh if you listen closely, you can hear the screams of the far right now…

Seriously though, for the majority of human existence, the pervading truth was that there was two genders, sex, and one godly way to bang it out. But as more humans were created from hetero-love making, we began to realize that although that is true for the vast majority, there are some people who identify and feel differently. This doesn’t make the truth any less true, our understanding is just evolving along with the world. Truth isn’t changing, we are.

Don’t worry lefties, I haven’t forgot about you. Let’s talk about “my truth”. I got to give it to you, this was clever. Stupid as all hell, but clever. “Oh wow! Typical man, calling something he has no idea about stupid. No wonder the ozone is depleting.” The ozone? What the hell are you talking about? Did you even listen to what I said? I said the concept was cle- “NO!! You said I was stupid! Clear as day. You said ‘blah blah racist slur blah blah I’m a sexist blah blah stupid as hell’ end quote.”

Are you done? “Ohhh now you’re calling me dumb!! Wait until Sanjay Gupta get’s a load of this.”

Hopefully you see my point within this made up debate. “Oh so now I’m made up now!” SHUT THE FUCK UP. One more word and I’ll practice my second amendment right on your bitch ass. Man, I wish I had a legal firearm and you attacked me in a state that allows guns right now.

My point is, we confuse our feelings and opinions with the actual truth. Which makes complete sense. We all do this at some point in our lives. Our world feels like the reality and to some extent that’s true for each of us. But at certain point, we have to understand that truth is often more complex than the feelings and popular consensus of the day.

Sure our current understanding of gender and sex as a spectrum is more accurate than the rigid, heterosexual = good — anything else = bad, stone them in the streets, mentality of the past. That mindset has brought us to a point of understanding, where we try to treat everyone with dignity and respect. But it also doesn’t get us any closer to understanding the why. Why do people born as one thing feel like they should be the other?

Again, and I cannot reiterate this enough, I don’t give a shit about the answer to that question. I’m completely fine not uncovering that truth. Knowing the truth about gender and sex won’t help me treat people any better. There are plenty of people out there who are closer to finding the truth about this than I will ever be. Some by way of research and advancing theories, others through their experience and the opinions they develop for themselves along the way. One way or another, truth will reveal itself.

So what do we do until that happens? Beyond gender and sex, there are so many realms where truth resides. How are we to discover the jewel in the field? Well, from my perspective, we all have three choices.

One, devote your life to discovering truth. Test what you know, challenge everything, do your best to find it for yourself. Two, let it find you. Feel everything, every emotion and sensibility that truth will bring to you. Accept these feelings and understand although you may not know it fully, what you’ve felt is real and a part of the universal truth. And three, my favorite, stop giving a shit.

Seriously, you’re not going to discover or feel every truth available to mankind, so don’t try! Instead, use all that extra energy and care you’re going to get back in the process to give a shit about others. Listen to them. Truth is beyond our individual experience and by caring for other people, we give ourselves a chance to catch a glimpse of it, one that we were otherwise never going to have.

As contrary as it may sound, not giving a shit has changed my life. Not only has it exposed me to truths I never would have uncovered on my own, it allows me to share it with others. People just like you. Now you may disagree with my assessment and that’s fine. I don’t give a shit. That includes my own opinions and beliefs. There is far too much to care about to let my thoughts rule the day. A universe of theories and discoveries still waiting to unfold. This is my belief now but further down the road, I may read this and cringe. But that’s the beauty of not giving a shit, because I will be open to feeling that way. Open to learning, growing, and evolving just as our understanding of truth does.